Anatomy Drawing

We are our experiences.

Rather than asking "What is wrong with me?" it is usually more helpful to ask "What has happened to me?" We are our experiences. What often happens is that in order to cope with these experiences we lose sight of who we are and what we want from life. Most of us focus on meeting the expectations of others without taking the time to think about our own needs. We put these to one side in the interest of doing the right thing, but this can then cause problematic thoughts, feelings and behaviour.

We are human.

We are flesh and blood and skin and bones. We have hormones and complex bodies and brains which were not designed for the way we live today. Every one of us is unique yet we often tend to believe that we all think and feel the same. Sometimes it can feel like we are going crazy and we can be very good at hiding what is really going on. You think everyone else is ok but most of us struggle with something at some point in our lives. Thoughts, feelings and behaviour can become muddled and confusing. It can be almost as though we are in constant battle with ourselves.

Travel Polaroids

We don't want to burden others.

When we are going through a tough time, or even with just day to day stuff, we quite often don't want to burden others with our problems, especially if they have troubles of their own. There can be a fear that others will judge us or be hurt by what we say.  This can be lonely and exhausting. When we feel that we are struggling, there can be the worry that if we talk about our own problems, others might talk about their troubles too with us and add to our burden. We try to be strong as this is what we are told from a young age, but being strong takes its toll if we are never able to offload some of what we are carrying.

Thinking Man on Couch

We need to express ourselves.

Did you ever have a problem to solve and saying it out loud to someone else helped you get to the answer? That's how counselling works. Explaining things to a person who will not judge you and has no emotional connection to what you are saying, helps you to understand yourself and others. I will ask you questions to prompt you to think more deeply about certain aspects of what you are saying. This process is sometimes challenging but done gently and at your pace. 

2 Puzzle Pieces